In our previous discussion we looked at the beginning of marriage and how God established this awesome union between Adam and Eve. One of the main reasons for God instituting marriage is to expand the human race and also through men establish his Kingdom on earth.
God had establish Adam before bringing him Eve. He first have to give him Eden "PRESENCE OF GOD", secondly he gives him Work and thirdly his Word. When Adam was complete in this fashion he then said it is not good that Adam as complete as he is leaves alone. God made a helper that suites him. Marriage is not for kids or boys and girls but for matured men and women. Marriage of our time is mostly initiated by LOVE and couples do believe that LOVE is enough to keep the marriage working as they want it but that is not the case.
GENESIS 2:15 - 18 "The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. 16 And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”
BEFORE MARRIAGE - ALONE BUT NOT SINGLE
How your marriage will become mostly depends on how you handle your single life. Most marital problems are as a result of how we mishandled our single lives. There is always a misconception of being SINGLE and being ALONE. Don't forget that God said it was not good for man to be alone but not single, Adam was alone but not single. Lot of people get married and now feel they have to explore and discover their single lives. The thing is that you can be married and still be single and that very beautiful because it adds up to the beauty of the marriage but immediately one becomes married he/she seizes to be alone.
NOTE: Meanings of alone and single
Alone means “by yourself” – there is nobody else with you.
Lonely means “feeling sad and isolated” – it is a negative emotion.
Single: Only one in number, one only, unique, distinct,special
Suitable for one person only, solitary or sole(lone)
From the above definitions of SINGLE and ALONE we realize that people have in many occasions lived a lonely life ignoring how important it is to invest into once single life. The investments you make into your single life becomes a reflection of what your married life will become.
To be single is to invest in your moral and social life making yourself distinct and unique among your fellow men and women. So the bible says in PROVERBS 31:10 " Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies". The word virtuous means having good moral qualities and behavior, being unique, being distinct from all women, special from all women. So the bible is basically telling us a woman who has invested into his single life who can find? If your single life fails your marital life will fail. How can one invest and enjoy his/her single life?
I always tell people have time to discover yourself so that people you meet will appreciate you. Lots of people live the opposite of themselves because they want to please people. In the olden days our grandmothers concentrated in investing into the single lives of our mothers and because of that they enjoyed marriage for ages. Learn how to keep a home, learn how to manage your finances, cultivate the attitude of gratitude, learn how to associate with people, learn how to appreciate work and others. When you are complete that is only when God can bring you a complete person.
You are all about makeups, parties, always eating from restaurants, living and extravagant life even above your budget and your prayer is to met an honorable man for marriage? My sister you are a disaster waiting to happen,please you can start getting back to doing the very things you have ignored and see yourself enjoying your marriage. Adam had been completed, enjoying and investing into his single life and only that qualified him to get out of his lonely life. After God has seen him complete with his presence, work and his word, he brought him Eve. You can't cook, wash well, manage your single life, save, invest, etc and you are praying soo much for marriage? This is what Abraham told his servant when he sent him to get a wife for his son Isaac "GENESIS 24:2 One day Abraham said to his oldest servant, the man in charge of his household, “Take an oath by putting your hand under my thigh. 3 Swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and earth, that you will not allow my son to marry one of these local Canaanite women. 4 Go instead to my homeland, to my relatives, and find a wife there for my son Isaac.”
The Canaanite women were known to live an ungodly life and were pagan worshipers so Abraham was very particular with who Isaac get's married to and that how serious he was with his son's marriage. Solomon was a great man of God who valued the worship of God but when he was yoked with certain women he became an idol worshiper, Samson lost everything because' of the woman he married. Esther married a noble man and saved her people and established her generation. Esther invested soo much into her single life to an extent that the king had to meet her on the field working. Take into consideration the things you do during your single moments, they are very vital.
If you are a man not working, irresponsible, living an odd life you don't deserve to be in marriage because who ever you marry becomes your responsibility and yours only.
Don't forget your single life has a major roll in how decorated your marriage will become.
Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefilled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge. Hebrews 13:4
The next chapter of this lesson will tackle issues that need to be taken into consideration before you settle down with your partner. I am much interested in the things that happens before marriage because they easily influence the marriage. Don't forget that LOVE, SEX AND MONEY is not enough for a successful marriage but their great influences cannot be down played.
My name is Donalson Nhyira Boateng (THE COUNSELOR), a motivational speaker, relationship expert, Counselor and an Entrepreneur. I am available for public speaking,tv/radio programs and counseling. You can contact me through the following numbers 0540956125 (Whatsapp) and 0554786408.
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Email: donalson2020@gmail.com
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